Day 1 4/11/2020
I was in denial long enough. I was letting “her” win yet again. I only ask God for forgiveness as I was on the road to trashing the body He has given me. A body strong, resilient and totally dependent upon sugar and other earthly things instead of Him.
Today I was honest – I weighed and measured myself. I don’t recall when I was this heavy…. Before it was a goal on the way down now it’s a new starting point. 1 more pound and it would have been another group of 10…. That makes me sad and determined all at the same time. I have asked God to help me yet again, climb back off the throne and let Him have the seat that is rightfully His. He knows what I need…….I obviously do not.
I use food to numb…. I’ve known that. I use food when I’m tired, when I’m stressed, when I am overwhelmed and when I’m bored. There was a time when I said I was not an emotional eater…. WOW is that ever a lie!
Today I had a healthy shake, a snack of apple and peanut butter when I wanted licorice and the rest of the day was a step up from where I normally am. I dug out my food/exercise journal and started tracking. I have all the tools I need.
A perfect day? No. A step in the right direction, yes. I’m not after perfection. I am after being persistent in my choices, being aware and not letting my emotions rule what I put in my mouth.
I choose healthy. I want to be healthy. Nobody wants to “follow” an unhealthy coach. I wouldn’t follow me, so why would you. I will be healthy. Want is a wish – will be is an action.
Step 1 – included a walk even when I didn’t want to go out in the wind. I did it anyway.
I will do this anyway…. One day will become 2 and then 3 and then 4…..